Saturday, November 9, 2013

Go Girl: For the girl who has everything. (And wants to stand and pee)

Ok, we're in  BassPro looking at the portable toilets. We are planning on taking the kids out west for an extended camping trip. We are going to need a toilet…among other things. That is when we spotted the GoGirl. I feel like my life has been forever changed.

It is an apparatus, if you will, that allows women to pee standing up! What? Pee, standing up? Count me in. Well, let me just cross that off my bucket list.

It comes in a little tube that explains it can be used while camping, boating, traveling, music festivals or sports.

Inside, you will find directions printed on a duel service disposable bag. It states: 1.  For best results, maintaining a seal on the back is important. 2. Practice at home to be sure you have a good seal. It is accompanied by two tissues.

Here is a nice close up. This side up…in case you were confused. In my mind, I'm thinking they didn't just put that there for no reason. Someone, somewhere was confused about this. I snapped this picture while inside the BassPro. An employee busted me and said that every time they get them in stock they sell out rather quickly. He assumed they were being purchased for gag gifts. He said he caught a guy looking at it and said, "Don't worry the girl that returned it said she didn't use it." Our conversation went further and he said that he thought that peeing standing up was the last thing that men could do that women couldn't. So I said, "I guess that's why you squat now?" He just walked off laughing. I'll take that as a yes!

I guess the illustration is to tell you not to squeeze it closed while in use. Hello? 

I'm guessing you figured out by now I couldn't leave the store without this life changing product. For $12.99 can have your own GoGirl.

Anyone who knows me for more than five minutes, knows I'm terrible OCD. Me and public toilets aren't friends. I can't remember the last time I've used a port-o-let other than to pee behind.

I felt it was my civic duty to give this thing a try. A-MAZ-ING.  

I must be a natural because I got it right the first time. I peed with joy! Seriously, I was laughing the entire time.  I think the only way this could have been any more fun is if  I were taking a leak peeing off the side of a canoe, or on the Appalachian Trail, or into bushes, or off a building, or off the Grand Canyon, or into Niagara Falls or a WalMart bathroom.

Seriously, this is life changing. I will be buying Ansley her own GoGirl. Because, really it'd be gross to share. My only problem is what kind of looks will you get cleaning this joker off in the public sink?

Penis Envy, NO MORE! I can write my own darn name in the snow!

Go to to get your own GoGirl!

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